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Post by x---Lindsay---> ♥ on May 1, 2006 15:46:48 GMT -5
Lindsay sat on the beach, scrunching sand inbetween her wet feet. The beach was dark, and yet still awfully warm for night time. She hadn't been on the beach at this time for ages it seemed. Ever since Seoras. But she learned to move on and continue enjoying life. Besides, she had Pete now. And he was much better than Seoras. She smiled. It was nice to feel wanted again. She felt unwanted so many times before. She sighed and breathed in the smell of salt water and sand. She crossed her legs and pulled her hoodie tight to her body. It was nice to be alone sometimes.
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Post by Seoras Reinard on May 1, 2006 16:09:37 GMT -5
"Oh...my head..." Seoras walked along the beach holding his head with his right hand. Why was his headache so bad? He couldn't even sleep...and that was something he really needed to do. But what could he do? The medicine was taking too long to work, so he figured he might as well go get sleepy somewhere so he would fall asleep when his head stopped pounding. He still had bruises from his trip through that tree...
He walking along, feeling the sand shifting beneath his feet, not looking where he was going. This would probably be the main reason why he suddenly found himself kissing the ground, seaweed clinging about his legs. "Ow..." he muttered as he kicked away the offending plant and started to stand up. He looked up to see where exactly he was and stopped cold. Major dejavu...Lindsay was sitting on the beach nearby, and he had just fallen on his face after being attacked by seaweed. "Those who do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it..." he quoted to himself, fairly sure he had mangled the wise words of someone who hadcome long before him. "So, now what? Talking to her might not be such a good idea...not after what I did to her..." Seoras sighed and continued walking slowly, having no idea of what he was going to do. Pass by or stop and say something? Both choices had their downsides...he never caught a break, did he?
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Post by x---Lindsay---> ♥ on May 1, 2006 16:14:20 GMT -5
Lindsay was looking the opposite way and enjoying watching seagulls. She breathed in the air again, and was oblivious to the thump sound on her other side. She didn't bother to look. Or maybe she should. Lindsay slowly turned her head to see where the thump came from. She jumped to her feet in record timing and had a very shocked look on her face. Her legs felt numb and frozen. She wanted to run, but she couldn't feel an inch of her own legs. She just stood there, eyes wide and jaw dropped. She attempted to move her feet. Nothing. No movement. Just silence.
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Post by Seoras Reinard on May 1, 2006 16:43:53 GMT -5
Seoras half-smiled inwardly when Lindsay jumped up. "Should have expected that...had she ever moved that fast? More importantly, now what? That was one heck of a look on her face though..." He couldn't help it. He brought his hand to his mouth in a rather failed attempt to disguise the smile on his face, as the light was dancing about in his eyes.
"I'm sorry, didn't mean to startle you...should see the look on your face, priceless..." Why was acting like that? Ah, what the hey, no use dwelling on the past if he could help it, too much pain there, just try and act normal, like you want to be friends...even if that might not work, it's worth a go. "Can't make things worse, can I? Don't jinx it now..."
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Post by x---Lindsay---> ♥ on May 1, 2006 16:49:31 GMT -5
Lindsay still stood there. She blinked a few times making sure he was actually there. She lifted her jaw back up but her eyes were still big and surprised. Her feet still numb. She didn't say a word. She felt some feeling in her feet and took a step back. Only one. Then her feet felt numb again. What the heck, how could he just stand there and pretend that nothing ever happened? Was it even possible? She thought of so many names she could call him right now but her mouth wouldn't move. She just continued to stand there. Silent.
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Post by Seoras Reinard on May 1, 2006 17:02:50 GMT -5
"Ok, happy was obviously not the right emotion there...is she alright? She's frozen..."
The smile collapsed on his face as concern took over. "Lindsay, are you...are you ok?" he asked softly. "An-anything I can do?" Probably not the best thing to say, since what he could probably do for her would be go to far far away, preferably off a cliff of sorts, maybe with some sharp rocks at the bottom. He really wasn't sure he wanted to do that though...wouldn't get very far in life that way. She didn't look very happy to see him, which was perfectly reasonable given the circumstances, but he would prefer if she would just say something...hating was not something he did, and he found grudge-holding difficult, but he had yet to figure out why he was that way...He often had difficulty understanding why other people hated as much as they did or said they did, but he knew exactly why she would hate him. There was no reason for him to harbor any ill-will against Lindsay though...
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Post by x---Lindsay---> ♥ on May 1, 2006 17:06:43 GMT -5
Lindsay felt the feeling come back to her body. "How could you?" she asked, "I just need to know. Who did you love first? And why did you do this to me? I just need some closuer Seoras." she said softly. The wind blew threw her hair and she crossed her arms as tears dripped down her face, making her mascara run all over her cheeks and eyes. Her lips frowned at him. And then more silence fell over them.
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Post by Seoras Reinard on May 1, 2006 18:01:36 GMT -5
That cliff was looking mighty nice right about now...He had been trying to figure the same thing out for a while now. And now she was crying...dang, his life was going down the tubes, wasn't it? Seoras restrained himself from moving toward her to try and comfort her, something he knew would not be well-received.
"Closure...meaning she wanted to know that one thing so she would be able to forget about him...wonderful...and there is no 'right' answer to this. Either choice hurts. If it was her first, then how and why did Angel happen? And if it was Angel, how could I go against her for Lindsay? Oh...head..." Truth be told he didn't know who he had loved first. Angel, he had fallen in love with in a matter of hours on that day in the park and in the rain. Lindsay, he had known for a long time, so it was more gradual...but what did he say? Could he tell her something like that? It was just as bad an answer as the others...but it was the only one he had.
"I don't really have a good answer for that...It only took a day to fall for Angel, and you I had been falling in love with very slowly for some time...I don't even know which happened first...meeting you here that night or Angel that day in the park...I was too in love with both of you to care what month it was, never mind what day...I know this isn't the answer you want, but it is the only only I have. I'm sorry for hurting you...I never meant for any of this to happen, it just did, and there was nothing I could do..." She wanted closure, and that was one thing he could not and did not know how to give, though not for lack of wanting to.
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Post by x---Lindsay---> ♥ on May 1, 2006 19:19:06 GMT -5
Lindsay stood there. The tears flowing a little heavier now. Between sobs she said, "Yes or no answer. Did you love me first?" she asked. She just needed to know. That was the one thing she needed to hear. The correct answer would be 'no'. That he didn't cheat on her. But, well. There was no actual 'right' answer. But no could help a bit. She sobbed a little more. It was impossible for her to even look at him like she used to. There was no more connection. Even if he still did have feelings for her, she had feelings for someone else. Maybe some far off time they could be friends again, but she didn't think she could ever trust him the way she used to ever again.
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Post by Seoras Reinard on May 8, 2006 19:26:53 GMT -5
"Yes or no answer. Did you love me first?"
Seoras sighed, trying to collect his memories and put them in order. He had spent the entire day in the park, which meant it was a weekend...and at the beach...not sure. Try a different way. Who had he kissed first...no, time had flown differently for him then. What about...his thought-book? It had page numbers...He went into a sort of trance as he tried to remember what was on each page. "Ok, that was then...no they came after that...then there was...no...and then...Oh, found it...Now that I know, how do I tell her?"
He blinked a few times as he came back to reality, back to the beach with a girl he still loved. Seoras took a deep breath, letting it out again and trying to saddle it with his sadness and anxiety, failing rather miserably. He closed his eyes, unable to watch whatever look was about to come over her face do so.
"No..." he whispered, barely audible to himself. "I didn't...at least not as completely as I do..."
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Post by x---Lindsay---> ♥ on May 8, 2006 19:31:59 GMT -5
Lindsay got a very mad and very upset look on her face. "So I was your second choice, wasn't I? The one that you overlook to go be with the first one. Thanks a lot Seoras. Thanks for nothing but a shredded heart and a few tears that you're not even worthy of." she said with a huff. She turned around and began to walk away. Stopping ehrself to turn and say, "Goodbye Seoras. Goodbye to all the feeling sI've ever felt for you. Goodbye to you completely." She then continued to walk.
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